Category: Anxiety

You’re a not born to pay bills and loose weight…

I came across this picture and it got me thinking about myself and about what I constantly worry about.

I do get grave anxiety when it comes to pay bills and how I’m going to afford them and also I hatteeeeee my body. It actually grossed me out this morning. That shit ain’t healthy

So changes need to me made ☘️

I make it my mission to go out and enjoy my surroundings, the fresh air, the trees everyday but I’m starting to think I’m escaping what is the actually making me depressed and anxious instead of dealing with it head on.

I accept that I put it to the back on my mind. Focus on other more positive things which defiantly helps but it means the actually problems like money worry and my weight don’t ever get a look in.

Is this the right way to be?

What I’ve decided to do is be proactive, which is extremely hard when you constantly lack energy due to your mental health and other factors.

Plan of action.

Self work.

Why do I hate my body?

Whoever told me it was disgusting to vile.

I’m unique like everyone on this planet and we need to find the unique beauty within ourselves instead of doing fad diets and denying ourselves nights out or late lunches. I know personally I feel extremely guilty when I eat with friends or when I eat in general it’s almost like I don’t deserve to eat. Which is BS! Something I strongly plan on working on!

The next

Money

This is one of the biggest causes of depression because so many people now a days scrape by. Are on the breadline, turn to food banks and are on debt management. Before we all jump on these people I’m one of them and I currently work and am also studying to better myself.

So as a result of money stress I have cut back on a lot, which again has a negative impact because some stuff I need or use to make myself feel good in times of need like £1 Poundland nail polish to pamper myself or cheap face masks. They’ve all gone.

Whatever I’ve decided to do is focus on the end goal.

Work on my inner self to love who I am and what I look like.

Save for my future and remember my end goal instead of the instant gratification.

When I’ve tackled these minor parts of my illness hopefully it will teach me how to deal with the more serious.

Get grounded 🌳☘️🍀

My anxiety cripples me, it robs me, it keeps me in, it stops me growing; it’s basically the most toxic relationship I have ever had the pleasure of having. The worst thing it does?

It LIES.

It lies a huge amount, catastrophic, tells me I can’t do this, can’t be this, this person hates me, I said the wrong thing in 2001. It’s a recurring nightmare.

I spent years trying to fix it myself. Drinking way too much, drugs, self medicating, rebelling, feeling sorry for myself, staying in bed all day.

Until I had my boy and I psychically couldn’t stay in bed all day, I couldn’t watch Netflix, I couldn’t drink and I certainly couldn’t self medicate.

Saved me.

Even though the post natal depression, post natal psychosis demobilised me, stopped me dead in my tracks I am so grateful. It taught me how resilient I am and how above all else I will do anything for my son. Even when it means leaving the house and coming into a new social group when my anxiety and depression have both my arms and my legs and are fighting to keep me on the floor.

Saved me.

With a child I have to get out everyday because he has the energy and power of a little cute mini tornado. So I make myself. This is hard. Not everyone has children so doesn’t have this need to get out but the same rules still apply you still HAVE to. For your own wellbeing and sanity. Even if you’ve just walked down the road and posted a letter. The whole process means you had to get changed, get up and leave the house.

My best ever advice?

GET GROUNDED!

Get to the closest place that has trees, flowers, open space. Even if it’s just a local field or park. It really doesn’t have to be a massive nature reserve.

Look around you, what do you see? Trees, green leaves, flowers, purple, yellow, red, animals, people.

5 deep breathes.

What do you hear? Birds? Traffic? Children? People playing sport?

5 deep breathes

What do you smell? Greenery? Mud? Coffee? Pollution? Bonfire?

5 deep breaths.

What do you feel? Is it cold on your hands? Warm on your face? Wet on your feet? Can you feel a breeze, wind, rain or the sun?

5 deep breaths.

You can do this technique anywhere! Even if it’s just looking out your window!

Can do it on the bus, on the train, in town, at the park, on holiday. Works anywhere and MY GOD it helps me so much in so many ways!

Not only does it calm me right down and help me take on any challenges it shows me just how grateful I am to live in the most beautiful world with all we have around us. It makes me grateful for my local area, what I already have and what I’m close to. Each time I see, here or feel something new. Even when it’s the same place pretty much everyday on my dog walk.

You can do it with any budget, any crippling feeling. I was taught it by a psychologist but it helps ground me so much I can’t actually express. I would recommend it to anyone and when I have it’s massively helped!

Happy Grounding!